Downtown art community stops whining

In an unexpected press release issued yesterday evening, the downtown Frederickstopia art community has announced that it has decided to stop whining. When asked, "About what?" Debby Klein, of the former Frederickstopia Fine Arts Commission, responded, "Oh, pretty much everything. Gallery conditions, poor sales, lack of funding, being ignored by the city... you name it, we're going to stop whining about it."

"I think it's great," said Brandon Newton, a local painter, "it means that as artists we can focus on other things... like our art." Not everyone is so optimistic. "Brandon Newton? He's just a hot, young kid," responded Bev Bley, one of the older artists in the area, "Wait until he's been around as long as I have. Then he'll see that there is plenty to whine about."

"I think this is a good move for everyone," said mayor Tom Tomzak, "we had no intention of ever giving in to any of their whining and quite frankly I was starting to get a little sick of it."

"It's just not fair," commented Benjamin Walker, president of Downtown Retail Marketing Inc., "we wanted to be the ones to issue a statement like this." When asked why they couldn't issue a similar statement, Walker pounded his fists on the floor and repeated, "It's just not fair."